Hi there blog fans! I am giving the cats a break from the blog this week so I can share some of my personal feelings with my devoted readers. (all 7 or so of you!)
Several events have happened recently that have caused me to reflect on my current situation in life. All of this reflection has led me to a simple revelation...I AM BLESSED. Let me explain a bit...
Last week I called up my mom and I was just extremely exhausted from the responsibilities of being a wife, mother, employee, sister, friend and student. I complained to my mom at length about how I just needed a "baby break" and some time to myself just to relax. She wasn't her usual self. She didn't proceed to feel pity for me and offer to take Parker off of my hands for a bit. Instead, she explained to me what she had experienced in the prior 24 hours. It put my "problems" in a whole new perspective. First of all, my mom and John have some friends (I think they are actually relatives of John's) whose daughter is supposed to get married this weekend. The prospective groom found out very recently that he has a mass in his lung that the doctors are concerned about. So rather than celebrating with his new bride this weekend, he will be recovering from what is sure to be a terrifying and major surgical procedure that will be done sometime this week. The wedding is being postponed until the fall so that his medical issues can be taken care of immediately. This man is not even 30 years old (at least I don't think he is). To top it off, the bride-to-be's father is now having testing done to examine a possible spot in his lung. I can't even to begin to imagine the immense fear and uncertainty that this family must be experiencing right now. Actually, I can sort of imagine it. Last month my sister Laura had her appendix removed because her doctor found a tumor attached to it. The surgery was on Wednesday. We didn't get the biopsy results until the following Monday. Those 5 days were seemingly the longest of my life. I don't think God has ever heard from me quite as often as he did in those days. Thankfully, the biopsy came back showing favorable results - the mass was not cancer. Getting that news was almost more exciting for me than the day I found out I was pregnant with Parker. Our family has been touched by cancer numerous times, and to FINALLY hear that God had spared us this time was SUCH A RELIEF. Anyway, to continue with my mom's phone conversation with me...
The day after she heard this news about this family, she and John were out checking their cows when they found that one of the younger heifers, Bella, had delivered her calf. The calf was dead, and Bella was not doing well. John ended up having to put her down, which just broke our hearts. We had watched Bella grow up since she was a calf just a couple of years ago. To see one of God's creatures lose her life due to an attempt to bring a new life into the world was just heartbreaking. Yes, they are only a couple of cows. But the circle of life seemed chopped into pieces in that case.
Then today my sister Laura sends me a touching email and includes a link to a blog that she is a devoted reader of. This was my first time ever to hear of this blog. http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ I found myself reading this family's story and just sitting in disbelief as I read about what seemed to be blow after blow that they were dealt. Yet, I was amazed and inspired. In spite of numerous losses in the family, the writer of the blog remains steadfast in her faith and surprisingly upbeat. And I thought to myself...."Here is a woman who has EVERY RIGHT to complain and to be mad at God. She has EVERY RIGHT to question God's very existence. She has EVERY RIGHT to be a non-believer and and to blame her misfortune on God, since there is seemingly no other way to explain her losses. Yet she remains steadfast in her faith and uses her experiences to minister to others." Unbelievable. And incredibly inspiring. I hope you'll take a minute to read her story if you have the time. I think you'll be inspired as well.
So today I have realized how incredibly blessed I am. I have my health. My family has their health. I have a husband who is an amazing companion to me and an even more amazing father to our son. I have 3 sisters who are incredible women and who are the best friends a girl could ask for. And I also have so many other friends who I know would be there for me at the drop of a hat if I needed them to be. And my parents...I can't even think of words to describe how blessed I am in this category. The guidance of my parents is my only explanation for how I have become the woman that I am. The weeks following the birth of my son convinced me that my mother must have superhuman powers, and that she is truly an angel sent to my family from God. I have the coolest in-laws around who are so willing to help out whenever we need them. I have a nice home, a stable job, and the 2 most awesome cats ever. But more importantly...I have Parker.
Parker is a miracle. Everytime I look at him I am completely amazed at how perfect he is. And yes, he does have his minor flaws (a potential third nipple, and seemingly a slight unibrow). But man that kid is amazing. Every single day he does something new to amuse me and to remind me just how incredible he is. He is my gift from God that I never knew how much I wanted. Everytime I look into those big brown eyes I completely melt and fall in love with him all over again. Even when he is fussing and screaming, I am completely amazed. God gave him this perfect little body, those perfect little lungs, his pefect, strong voice to express his feelings. God gave him those cute little cheeks and those chubby thighs. God gave him his bubbling personality that I get to watch develop every day. And God gave him to me. Of all people, He chose ME to be Parker's mommy. And I couldn't be more excited about that. I only hope and pray that someday my sisters will get to experience the joys and perils that being a mommy brings. (Heather is well on her way!)
Just a couple of pictures this week. I just took these earlier tonight. I often find myself going into Parker's room when he's asleep just to "check on him." More realistically, I'm just staring at him in awe of how beautiful he is and how incredible he is. And...he makes me laugh. His sleeping position is an interesting one that only gives me a smile everytime i see it.
Yep, that's his little butt hiked straight up in the air.
So the cats will be back next time with 5 month pictures of Parker and whatever other witty banter they come up with. Until then, count your blessings and give thanks for all you've been given!
Love,
Sarah
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